My husband had to let all of his employees go, and physically close down their office, last month. He can do what he does (medical billing) from home. Thankfully.
I had to significantly reduce the hours of my one full-time employee last month...she decided to leave instead, which I can totally understand. My paychecks the last four months have been not enough to pay the bills, and my husband's are zero...doctors don't feel like they need to pay their bills, which I also understand, since they are being stripped of most of their income by Medicare as it is, and most of which will retire when "Obamacare" is put in place. I know that all of my doctors are hanging it up next year...
The point of this is, I had a friend of 25 years lose his business, his wife, his savings, everything he had, recently, and decided to move back to Texas after being away for 10 years or so...his wife also came back even sooner because she has family here - we are all on good terms, so it's okay.
However, when my friend called me and asked if he could come visit to check out the possibilities, he went back home, packed up his car with the necessities, and moved the hell back to Texas. He is staying with us for however long he needs to - because that's what friends do...there is no time limit, there is no "rent", we do for each other whatever we can do and make no expectations or limitations on friendship. There is so little of that in this world now, that when you find that, cherish it...that unconditional love between friends is so rare that when you do have it, be so thankful and grateful and never take advantage of it...I have a handful of friends that I have that with, the ones I can call if I haven't talked to them in months, and pick up right where we left off. These friends were the ones I found working at Safari Bar in Arlington mostly...except for the girls - there are only two, my "sister" that I've known since 8th grade, and my "bartender bitch" that I've known for 20 years...
The point...which I didn't actually get to...is that so many of us in our generation (60's, 70's) are in such bad places - bankruptcy (yes), foreclosures (yes), IRS issues (yes) - but these are not things we want to talk about, so we feel so alone and like failures. We aren't alone! There are so many of us out there going through the same things, but embarrassed to share with anyone (of course), that we can't be there to support each other! I've only just realized how many others are going through the same awful situations as we are...
One thing that scares me most, and I'm not even a parent - is what are the kids going to be left with? I am one of those adult women in my 40's that still have to go to my parents when the car breaks down or we have just flat run out of money for the month...and there are a lot of us who hate to admit that - I HATE it to have to make that call...I know my parents have the money to be able to help me, but I HATE that we aren't capable at this age to make it on our own! So of course we have no retirement...we will have to work until we die....for those who do have some retirement at our age, what is going to happen to that by the time you retire? It may be pillaged and gone by the government...
So when our generation's kids need help, who can they go to? We don't have it, we're barely scraping by day-to-day...and heaven forbid should there be grandkids already and you aren't financially solid....you better hope your kids are finacially stable too. And we are already depleting OUR parent's inheritances with all the help we need - I know that I've made a big dent in that, however I would rather have the time with my parents than money when they pass away (which might be after me, as healthy as they are!).
I don't know what the answer is, but I do know that just talking with my friend, just opening my home (as crappy as it is) with no conditions, has helped me feel a little better - there are more of us in the same boat than we know, and we need to start talking to each other so we can help each other, rather than pretending nothing is wrong and the Titanic isn't sinking, cause the band is still playing....
